Change

$1.25. That’s how much incisors and bicuspids go for nowadays. The tooth fairy has met the demand of inflation. My snaggle-toothed son Hunter had lost his front tooth and knew exactly what he wanted to find under his pillow--$1.25. So the pixie searched and found a few quarters to fit the bill and a sleepy gapped toothed angel awoke to find some change to put in his portly piggy bank.
Change. It’s kind of everywhere I look. I find it in the cushions of my couch, the bottom of my purse, and sometimes on my classroom floor. I don’t really mind it. After collecting it for a while, Hunter, Parker, and I count it and call it “summer fun money.” It pays for ice cream on a hot summer day, a happy meal or two, and delights the boys for hours to toss pennies in the fountains in the mall. (Okay, may not hours, but at least a good thirty minutes if you ration the pennies right.)
Sometimes change is annoying. I’m not talking about the shiny kind. Instead, it’s what happens every day, every hour, every minute….change is occurring and there is nothing I can do about it. I used to think about what changes would occur in ten years. I envisioned my career and my family. After getting married and having kids, I shortened that number to five. After becoming a single parent, I started looking at one year.
Every year promises one thing--change. Other than God’s love, change is the only thing I can really count on. I know that everyone will get a little older and things won’t be the same. Sometimes I get nostalgic and miss the times when Hunter and Parker were little babies, just big enough to be cuddled and rocked. I think about when Hunter said his first words and Parker laughed a real laugh. I think of birthdays, Christmas, and memories made in what seemed like another lifetime. It is sometimes hard and weird to remember those times as I see pictures of myself from long ago. Even pictures of myself from five years ago don’t really look like me. I recognize the face, but I don’t really feel like that person anymore.
However, I am reminded of what is constant--God’s love for me--no matter what happens. I’m never without the One who has my best interest at heart. In Romans 8:39 in The Message Bible, it states, “I am absolutely convinced that nothing--nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable--absolutely nothing can get between us and God’s love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 speaks of seasons in life by saying “There is an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on earth.“ (The Message) In this season of my life, I am a mom to two incredible kids, a teacher to some remarkable students, a friend to some unique and loyal people, a daughter to compassionate parents, a sister to my hero (my sister), a cousin to my closest friend (my cousin), and the list goes on. This season is about finding who I am and who I want to be. It is not about gaining and earning, but breathing and living in a moment that is changing way too fast. Right now my boys hug and kiss on me like I’m better than warm chocolate chip cookies. Right now my parents play a vital role in my children’s lives. Right now cardboard boxes and Play-Doh are all part of pretty fabulous day. Right now a little bit of change under a pillow can delight a child--even if it’s just $1.25.
So I’ll take that change--all of it. The shiny kind and the not so sparkling kind--because I know that with growth, there must be change. In order for me to be who God wants me to be, I must grow and that means one thing--change. However, I will become what God has planned all along. He completes the good work in me that He has promised to do as He says in Philippians 1:6 “ There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears.“(The Message.) It won’t be easy. It won’t be painless. I’ll lose something as I gain other things. But as the Master works on me and helps me change, then the seasons will come and go and I’ll be alive in them. I’ll experience fully what each season brings. I’ll cherish the happy memories, cry over the sad moments, and laugh fully and wholeheartedly any chance I get.
I don’t know what changes the year 2008 will bring. I do know more teeth will be lost and a fairy will have to find $1.25 to put under a pillow. Just as Hunter and Parker have surprises to come, I know God has some pretty shiny and sparkling moments of change to come and surprise me, too. Best of all, I’ll shine like gold, as He purifies me and makes me into who He wants. I’ll sparkle and shine like a million diamonds, not just a $1.25.